Tuesday, October 2, 2007

My Thoughts On The Story

I have to agree with some of Becka's comments on Kelly's story. I think it's a little too long and probably too complicated for a 2-4 min film.

My thoughts:
I also think we should keep DQ's idea of the ox looking up at the constellations and imagining or holding up a piece of paper with a chicken-scratch drawing of his constellation on it. Instead of adding the night club with all the other celestial animals.. maybe when the ox is looking up at the constellations of the other animals, voices could be coming from the other animal's constellations saying negative things (ex. "LOSER!!" "Like he'll ever get up here") to the ox to put him down about ever dreaming of having a place in the stars. Hence.. no one has any faith in the ox (no respect). A plus would be that we wouldn't have to animate any other celestial characters (except maybe the mouth of a flat glowing outlined animal). Maybe just have the animal constellations glow when they talk.
crappy example:

After...
The sulking ox walks past the emperor and over hears him yelling over a newspaper that reads: "EMPEROR FAILS TO PLEASE HIS PEOPLE". He discovers that the emperor needs a messenger and the ox gets overly excited (jumps up and down) and begs and pleads that he can give the message to the ppl down on earth. Emperor wanting to rid of the problem and the annoyance of the ox, finally agrees and tells the ox that the ppl are to have 1 meal every 3 days. The excited Ox just nods frantically in agreement, utterly enthused with the prospect of proving himself.. (he just wants to go down and earn his constellation!!). The emperor stresses the importance of translating the msg exactly, but the Ox is too excited to pay attention and zips down through the clouds. .
.....
Ox goes to Earth all proud to be on a mission. Looks down at the ppl and tells them they will be given food. People weakly cheer. They ask the ox how much they will be given.. he says "Once every 3 days." and he looks very proud and happy with himself. **Hear the sound of crickets*** Obviously the people are not too happy about this, and are very dissapointed (not enough food). ** Guy falls to the ground** Ox looks at the ppl and see that they are suffering and hungry. He looks around nervously feeling guilty.. and then yells, "umm..uhh..ahh..I meant 3 times a day!!!!yayyy!!" **tail is tapping for his attention/frantically hitting him?** Crowd is now happy and cheers for the ox. the Ox is sheepishly happy. (kind of nervous but still happy)
....
Ox feeling good about his decision to change the emperor's msg.. he skips back up to heaven expecting to be rewarded. Emperor sees the ox and tells him that he should have listened to him and that now he must go to earth and help the ppl so that they will have enough food. The emperor hits the ox over the head with newspaper sending him falling back to earth with the plow falling above him.
....
The ox lands on a field. He looks sad and starts to plow the field. A small child approaches him and feeds him some grass/carrot? and the ox eats it and is happy again. background could show a sign reading "year of the ox". The end.... sky turns to night and you see the ox's constellation... narrator explains that since the ox had a kind heart he was still granted his place in the stars.


Hopefully this won't add any confusion.. just wanted to put my input down for the story!!! :P

6 comments:

andy Zeng said...

i think this is the most mature version we got so far. it seems it combines the funny one and the spider ox one together and it works really well.

Alex Haddock said...

I was thinking that there might be some confusion when the ox is looking at the constellations and then all the sudden he is with the emperor in the bright heaven skies. I was thinking he could start off looking at the night sky.. then you see him jump down a bunch of clouds and the sky fades back to a bright blue. This way the audience gets more of a feeling of heaven than outerspace or night time.
ORRR there could be a giant light switch the ox turns back on and then walks out of the a room labeled "Room of Celestial Viewing". hahahaha
Hopefully you can picture everything i've said.

Coelasquid said...

I like the beginning, but after he gets to earth it seems a little... I dunno... unenthusiastic? It may just be how it's playing out in my head...
Ah well, we can hash out the details in school tomorrow. Thanks Alex!

Angeline said...

I like Kelly's bit about the ox returning to heaven, and the emperor punishing him before he gets the next days paper, telling him his approval rating has skyrocketed, and he's bound by his word to punish the ox, but tries to soften it.

Or we could have the people be the ones who give him the constellation, in thanks for all he's given up.

LeMark said...

i like both ideas, i might be more leaning towards kellys aswell, i made some minor touch ups that might be interesting, i have drawn out panels visuallizing what i want to show in some points, so like that u guys can understand where im heading with the idea, its too big for my roomys scanner so ill show yall tomorro at meeting

Jason Gerardus Teeuwissen said...

I really like your take on the story it’s simple and gets to the point. The sequence at the starting where the celestial animals are up in the sky talking could make for some really effective and less time consuming scenes. the only thing is i think that when the Ox make's his way to earth and tells the people that we could build up abit more there. The ending where it say "year of the ox" is also a great idea.